But do not feel happy at all due to my worse BMT performance

I was thinking that wat is the use of finishing BMT with bad performance

There is nothing to be happen about..Just feeling disappointed with the BMT results

Feeling that I am so useless..

Went out today..

Bought new year clothes, was quite happy that I manage to buy clothes that I like..

However it is no longer that happy compare to the pass when I bought my new year clothes...

Dunno why.. is it that I am growing older?

I suddenly feel that I am so far back compare to the people around me..

My achievements compare to others is nothing..

I am not good in anything at all, no talent , no good academic results , no dreams, no job that I wan to work in the future and I dunno anything.

I feel so bad when I start to think about it!

I REALLY DUNNO WHAT I WAN!

I guess what I wan is to have some time to really sort out what I really want.

I think I had change a lot,

from a very helpful person to a selfish one,

speak more "bad" words compare to the past,

spend more money compare to past,

lack of confidence and become less daring

I feel like I had become a useless person with no value in me.

I dun think that I do not have improvement in personal value other than my physically improvements

I think that what I need to do is to set my character right and continue to move on.

I will take this week to think about everything and start to work on it...

I really have a very good , understanding, caring and great girlfriend!

She is so kind and good although she is a bit bad in temper but I really still love her a lot...

Sometimes I really dunno why, I will kinda of stone there for a while and neglect my GF..

She will then think I ignore her, But that is not the case, sometimes i really stone..

Although there are times when I really ignore her, but is really by accident,

Which guy would want to ignore her GF and get scolding by her, stupid right?

I really hope that I can change this kind of weird behavior,

I really must change, because I really love my girl!

Time pass really fast!

Soon it will be our 3 year anniversary...very happy that we can come to this stage..

hope that on 16/3/2012, I am able to celebrate with her, although that day is a friday..

hahaha!:D